One week out

Ok, ten days. I have ten days.

That seems fair. The longest I have ever traveled out of the country is ten days, and that seemed like a lifetime. So, ten days before I leave for Bolivia for three months. No problem.

Although, I am not sleeping at night. I dreamed of my little dog that disappeared two years ago. I knew we would not find her in the amount of time she has been missing, but now I know I never will and I dreamed about her. And a photo album. There was a photo album that I could not recall coming across when I put my items in storage. I thought about that from 2 a.m. until 5. I have dreamed of friends I haven't seen for years and there has been a rush to see friends before I go.

My first foray is only three months, but it is still intimidating. I am headed to the poorest country in South America with little knowledge of the language or the culture. I signed onto DuoLingo, which swears I have three percent proficiency in the language. Awesome. I can tell you that Juan eats apples and learned that day is masculine and night is feminine. Someone pointed out to me in all languages "pants" is masculine, because the man always wears the pants, and "problems" are always feminine (ie "muchos problemas"). Haha.

There is a lot to still arrange. Today I am reviewing my suitcase. I need to buy a better suitcase, a laptop, socks. I am sitting in a motel room looking out at a mini-snow landscape laughing because I only kept summer clothes out of storage. I am flying into 110 degree summer in a week, you know? Visits to the bank, lunch with my friends, lots of kisses to my kids... My son turns 21 in four days. I am glad that I did not leave before his birthday. I will still be spending more in America for 3 months to keep my life going (phone bills, car insurance, health insurance, storage) than I will spend flying to and living in another country, That is alarming,

But I have faith. The journey to get to this point has been long, and the affirmation that I am on the path I am supposed to be at this moment has been intense, immediate, and constantly present. For this, I am grateful. I am excited and anxious and working on having no expectation. I have some loose ideas about the road ahead, but mostly, I want to be alive in the moment and aware of the world and my place in it.

We will see.

One week more. Ten days more.